Faith

Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. -Heb. 11:1

My walk with God is currently full of things I am unable to fully see right now. Honestly, sometimes I am not completely certain and sure of the unseen things that I hope for such as raising 100% of my support. Yet, despite my doubts and unbelieving heart, God has so much grace and blesses me when I least expect it. The past few days I had been filled with anxiety over support raising and doubts that God could make things happen. As I look back, I was silly for believing my circumstances were out of God's control. But God knew I needed encouragement and assurance that He is always working things together for good--even if I do not see it at the moment. He brought my support up a significant amount last night, even in my state of unbelief. Not because of anything I had done to deserve it, but because it brought Him so much glory! Let me tell you when I recieved that support pledge I was literally jumping and yelling all around the house. It was great to experience such joy for that blessing. God totally knew what He was doing. I think sometimes we need the hard times so that we will slow down and look to God instead of ourselves. If things were always going well in our lives, then we would have no realization that God is the One who is in control. It's from Him that we recieve all good things...not ourselves. It was humbling and awesome to experience God's faithfulness to provide. At the same time, I realized how weak my faith is. I had trouble being certain of what I could not see. When I got the tangible confirmation of a support pledge, it was easy to praise the Lord and acknowledge how good and faithful He is. But, really we are called to have faith in that same fact whether we can see it then or not.

The book of Hebrews recounts the faith of the Old Testament persons--their faith was conpletely based off of what they could not and would not see.

All these people were still living by faith when they died. They did not recieve the things they promised; they only saw them and welcomed then from a distance. And they admitted that they were aliens and strangers on earth. -Heb. 11:13

I don't realize sometimes that since we are not "at home" on earth, God's promises to us are sometimes fulfilled on the other side of this life. This is the type of faith the people of the OT had--faith that God fulfills all promises, yet since we are not at our final destination or home we look to heaven. That which we do not see right now, we can have faith we will see after death. At times of stress and frustration with my sin and the things in this world, I am so happy to claim my citizenship in heaven. I embrace the fact that I am here for only a short time to fulfill my own purpose of bringing God glory in this life and then returning home to my Father in heaven.

our merciful and faithful high priest

Who ever said the Christian life was easy, must have never lived the Christian life. It seems like I'm constantly realizing how unable I am to do anything good on my own. It sounds like your normal sob story doesn't it? It might even be deemed depressing that I've realized I can't even live up to the standards I set for myself, let alone the perfect standards of Almighty God. It sure would be sad...If I didn't have Jesus to make up for all that I lack. Lately I've been denying how powerful Jesus can be in my life. Although I have accepted that my sins can only be washed away by Him, I haven't been recognizing His ability to relate to the everyday problems that I face. When I fail to bring these problems to Him, so that I can recieve the power He provides, I experience failure. I become increasingly aware of my inability to do anything right...because on my own I can't. But with Jesus, it's possible. While reading through Hebrews I was reminded of Christ's victory over sin and the fact that He lived a perfect life. PERFECT. I cannot even fathom that word, being the imperfect person that I am.

For this reason he had to be made like his brothers in every way, in order that he might become a merciful and faithful high priest in service to God, and that he might make atonement for the sins of the people. Because he himself suffered when he was tempted, he is able to help those who are being tempted. - Heb. 2:17-18

Not only do I have my sins forgiven through Jesus, but I also have the power to overcome temptations that are thrown my way. The One who lives in me is more powerful than the world I am in. When I suffer, He can relate because He has suffered in that same way; yet He suffered without sinning. How humbling and yet freeing to know that although I can do nothing good on my own, Christ does all good things and wants to help me live rightly for Him. Nope, the Christian life is not easy...but it's so worth it.

"by his wounds you have been healed."

Today as I was reading through 1Peter, I was once again in awe of the reality of the cross. I think that most of the time, I tend to become numb to the gospel--it's sad and disappointing that I take such a sacrifice for granted. The following helped me realize the awesome nature of Jesus' sacrifice for me on the cross:

' He committed no sin, and no deceit was found in his mouth.' When they hurled their insults at him, he did not retaliate; when he suffered, he made no threats. Instead, he entrusted himself to him who judges justly. He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; by his wounds you have been healed. (23-24)

I seriously read this today, and reacted as though I had never heard this before! It was so exciting that God had softened my heart and I was again so appreciative of the salvation through this act on the cross. And amidst such persecution and intense hatred, Jesus continued to live on his Father's plan for the world. Instead of righting His name when they insulted Him, He sought the power for patience from the Father--trusting that in time all would be judged for their actions. When they beat Him, He did not fight back but instead in perfect submission bore the sinful actions of His accusers on Himself. Instead of wishing malice on them, he allowed a way for them to be cleansed of their wrongs through the shedding of His blood. And as He suffered He made no threats, because He knew His Father's will was to be done. It was through this attitude of self-sacrifice and holiness that Jesus died for each of us on the cross. What a motivation to want to serve Him with that same attitude in my life everyday.

As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance. But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do; for it is written: 'Be holy, because I am holy.' -1 Peter 1:14-16

clean vessels

I know that I am a vessel that can be used by God. But, today I was able to see the purpose of my life through the eyes of God a little bit clearer. While studying 2 Timothy, our instructor, (via my handy dandy cd of class lectures) Gary Stanley pointed our usefulness in relation to the common event of getting a glass of water. I have a ton of glasses in my cabinet--and their purpose? To sit in that cabinet until I need to use one of them. They fulfill their intended purpose by merely waiting to be used. Then, once I feel thirsty and want something to drink, I go to grab one. What is the criteria for which glass I will pick? Well, I must admit that sometimes I'm in the mood to drink from a pink one, or might be really thirsty and want a big one; but the overall, most important factor is cleanliness. I will assure you that I will not choose a glass that is dirty to drink from. I say all of this because it relates to a great passage in 2 Timothy 2: 20-21:
In a large house there are articles not only of gold and silver, but also of wood and clay; some are for noble purposes and some for ignoble. If a man cleanses himself from the latter. he will be an instrument for noble purposes, made holy, useful to the Master and prepared to do any good work.
Sometimes I forget that by patiently waiting on the Lord, I am fulfilling the purpose He has for me. While I am not being used, I am blessed with time to purify my life even more, so that I will be even more useful for Him than before. There are so many things in my life that are demanding my patience. The Lord knows that I am so weak in that area...I too often am hasty and neglect the opportunity to be still and trust. This passage gives so much vision to why things are the way they are in my life right now. God knows that I am not ready to be used in the exact way He wants me to be used in Indy. He knows that while I am at home, He has my full attention as I cling to Him through the frustrations of being at home and raising support. Although I certainly don't act like it sometimes, I'm so glad that I'm not in control. Instead, the One who knows it ALL is making my paths straight and working it all together for good. Praise the Lord for He is good!!

forgiveness

As I sat down today, to tackle the seemingly endless mound of reading and listening to lectures for New Testament Survey, it was amazing how God met me in my time in the word. Not only that, but I am always amazed at how what God does in the lives of other people truly ministers to me. A major theme for my lesson today was forgiveness. I looked at the little book of Philemon. I never had realized that there was such a parellel in that book to the forgiveness we find from Christ. As the story goes, Onesimus was a slave who stole from his master Philemon and ran away only to meet Paul in Rome. There, Paul shared Christ with this runaway slave and after finding out his past encouraged him to be seek the forgiveness of his master. In that day, a crime such as his would be punishable with death, so this decision to return to Philemon was undoubtedly a difficult one for Onesimus. Yet, Paul interceeds for him through this letter to Philemon, who was a fellow follower of Christ. Paul appeals on Onesimus' behalf saying: "So if you consider me a partner, welcome him as you would welcome me. If he has done you any wrong or owes you anything, charge it to me." (17-18) What a testimony of a life lived in the footsteps of Christ. Christ took our place and payed our penalty on the cross, and in return allowed us to stand in his perfect, blameless position in God's eyes. In that same act of self sacrifice and humility, Paul pleas that Philemon welcome his runaway slave as though he were Paul and asks that any debt me charged to him--not because the slave deserved this grace, but because Paul understood that Christ did the same thing for him. WOW....the world would be such a different place if we all grasped Christ's sacrifice for us in this same way. Paul saw his brother in Christ through the eyes of God, as a loved and forgiven son instead of a condemned sinner. I pray that I will develop this type of compassion for my fellow brothers and sisters in faith. That the Lord will pierce my heart with the reality of God's grace--that it is a gift and not because of anything I did to deserve it.

But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ when we were dead in transgressions--it is by grace you have been saved." -Ephesians 2:5